Give 'Em An Inch....

…and they’ll take a mile. I’m learning this lesson very slowly about people. Unfortunately it is coming at the expense of my heart and my sanity.

In person, I’m a pretty nice person…at least I’d like to think that. I’ll usually put other people’s needs ahead of my own and ensure everybody is comfortable before I settle in. Fuck, I’ll even let someone win a game if I think it’ll keep the peace. I blame my mother for this trait.

“Well that sounds like a nice way to be OQA, whatcha bitchin’ about?” Of course it’s nice, for everybody involved until others start to take advantage of my good graces. I don’t think it’s a conscious decision on their part, it is human nature. We are out to consume as much as we can in as little time as possible. This applies to anything; food, media, the planet, other people. I’m not saying we are out to eat one another in a literal sense but we do have a tendency to gnaw on other’s hearts for a while before we show our true nature, spit them out and grind them into the ground with our dirty shoe. The heart eating and shoe grinding are extreme examples but I think I’ve made a fair point, right?

I’ve been kind, and in a lot of cases, generous, to many people over the years that have ended up using me as a bridge to something better. It starts with small favours, continues into an abuse of my talents and when I can’t possibly give any more, they ask again. And again. And again. It’s in my nature to help people; I cannot deny that part of myself. I actually do enjoy people’s reactions to my niceties and rarely expect anything in return. A selfless act should be just that, selfless. One should not expect anything in return but one should also not become the mat in front of the door into their own heart.

All that being said, I am an expert in the absurd, the awkward, the obscene and most importantly, other people’s emotions. I can make a situation pretty damn prickly if I choose to. More often than not, I know what people are going to think or say before they do. I study people like a mathematician studies numbers. I truly am a master puppeteer when it comes to my fellow humans so please, stop fucking with me.