Yes. Just a little bit though. Clinically depressed is the diagnosis. Does this mean I'm suicidal? Nope, that thought never crossed my mind. Does this mean I have a chemical imbalance in my brain causing me to be sadder than usual, suffer from low self-esteem, and lack interest in activities that I enjoy? Yes. Luckily, I have a great support system in place, effective medication, and fantastic doctors.
Mental/emotional disorders are more common than one thinks but still they have a certain amount of shame surrounding them. The stigma of mental disorders can be devastating to individuals who are diagnosed causing them to go into denial, refuse medication and/or counselling and eventually cause harm to themselves or others. Why is this still happening after decades of research and education? Do we blame it on the media? Do we blame it on the medical profession? Big Pharma? Our parents? I blame it on a lack of education and negative stereotypes. It's never too early to learn about the way your brain works and the things that can go wrong with it. It's also never too early to teach children about depression and the side-effects of common mental and emotional issues. This is especially true if you have a family history of such conditions. A person with a relative who suffers from depression is five times more likely to develop the disorder themselves.
I've only recently discovered that talking about my condition openly is therapeutic and helps others to open up and discuss any negative feelings they may be having as well. They realise they are not alone in their emotional battles and the shame they feel about the disorder slowly lifts over time. I've also learned that this type of reveal can lead to discomfort for some people and denial for others. I can count on both hands the number of times I have heard "NO WAY!" or "it's just a phase, you'll get over it soon." In all honesty, I probably won't. It's been hard for me to accept that this is the way my brain is wired and I'll most likely take anti-depressants for the rest of my life. I won't always need the counselling or emotional support from others but it's nice to know that there are people in my life that understand and are willing to go that extra mile to ensure that I'm happy, healthy, and content.
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